- Setul doi, inca 10 glume cu redare audio si traducere.

Jokes - MP3 Player

Trains Are Always Late

Audio Joke 11 MP3
A man was complaining to a railroad engineer.
- What's the use of having a train schedule if the trains are always late.
The railroad engineer replied:
- How would we know they were late, if we didn't have a schedule?

Trenurile mereu intarzie

Un barbat se plangea catre un inginer de cale ferata.
- La ce foloseste sa ai un program al trenurilor daca trenurile mereu intarzie?
Inginerul de cale ferata a raspuns:
- Cum putem sa stim ca au intarziat, daca nu avem un program?

Which part?

Audio banc 12
- I was born in California.
- Which part?
- All of me.

Care parte?

- M-am nascut in California.
- Care parte?
- Intreg eu. (Toate partile mele)

Excuse me

Gluma MP3 13
- Excuse me. Do you know the way to the zoo?"
- No, I'm sorry I don't.
- Well, it's two blocks this way, then one block to the left.

Scuzati-ma

- Scuzati-ma. Cunoasteti drumul spre zoo?
- Nu, Imi pare rau, nu cunosc.
- Pai, e doua blocuri pe drumul acesta, apoi un bloc la stanga.

Kangaroo jump

Joke 14
- Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
- Yes, because the Empire State Building can't jump!

Saritura cangurului

- Poate un cangur sa sara mai sus decat Empire State Building?
- Da, fiindca Empire State Building nu poate sa sara!

Litera "I"

Humor 15
In the classroom the teacher is asking a student to do something.
Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with "I".
Student: I is the ...
Teacher: Stop! Never put "is" after "I". Always put 'am' after "I".
Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.

Litera I

In clasa profesorul cere unui elev sa faca ceva.
Profesor: Spune-mi o propozitie care incepe cu "I" (Eu).
Elev: I este ...
Profesor: Stop! Sa nu pui niciodata "este" dupa "Eu"'. Mereu sa pui "sunt" dupa "Eu".
Elev: Bine. Eu sunt a noua litera din alfabet.

I'm pretty

Gluma audio 16
- John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly. What do you think, Peter?
- I think you are pretty ugly.

Eu sunt dragut /a

- John spune ca sunt dragut /a. Andy spune ca sunt urat /a. Tu ce crezi, Peter?
- Eu cred ca esti destul de urat /a.

Will I be able to play the piano

Banc 17
- Doctor, will I be able to play the piano after the operation?
- Yes, of course.
- Great. I never could before.

Voi putea sa cant la pian

- Doctore, voi putea sa cant la pian dupa operatie?
- Da, desigur.
- Grozav. Niciodata nu am putut inainte.

Tenses

Audio Joke 18
The teacher says: Today, we're going to talk about the tenses. Now, if I say "I am beautiful," which tense is it?
The student says: Obviously it's the past tense.

Timpuri (gramaticale)

Profesoara spune: Astazi vorbim despre timpuri. Acum, daca eu spun "Eu sunt frumoasa", la ce timp este?
Elevul spune: Evident, e timpul trecut.

Workers

Gluma MP3 19
Two factory workers are talking:
The woman says: I can make the boss give me the day off.
The man replies: And how would you do that?
The woman says: Just wait and see.
She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling.
The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?"
The woman replies: I'm a light bulb.
The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off".
The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?"
The man says: I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark.

Muncitori

Doi muncitori din fabrica vorbesc:
Femeia spune: Pot sa-l fac pe sef sa-mi dea ziua libera.
Barbatul raspunde: Si cum ai sa faci asta?
Femeia spune: Asteapta doar si vezi.
Apoi ea se atarna cu capu-n jos de tavan.
Seful vine si spune "Ce faci?"
Femeia spune: Sunt un bec de lumina.
Apoi seful spune, "Ai muncit asa mult incat ai inebunit. Cred ca ai nevoie sa-ti iei ziua libera".
Barbatul incepe sa mearga dupa ea si seful spune, "Unde pleci?"
Barbatul spune: Plec acasa, nu pot lucra pe intuneric.

Baby brother

MP3 Joke 20
Two children are talking:
- Meet my new born brother.
- Oh, he is so handsome! What's his name?
- I don't know. I can't understand a word he says.

Fratele copil

Doi copii vorbesc:
- Fa cunostinta cu fratele meu nou-nascut.
- O, este asa de chipes! Care-i numele lui?
- Nu stiu. Nu inteleg nimic din ce spune.

Un Test simplu in fiecare zi

HTML
CSS
JavaScript
PHP-MySQL
Engleza
Spaniola
Clic pe tag-ul HTML care afiseaza o linie orizontala.
<br> <em> <hr>
Continut ...
<hr />
Alt continut sub linie ...
Care proprietate CSS defineste culoarea textului?
font-style font-variant color
h2 {
  color: #cbdafb;
}
Clic pe functia care cauta daca un anume caracter sau text e intr-un sir.
indexOf() toString() split()
var str = "Web courses - http://CoursesWeb.net/";
if(str.indexOf("http://") == -1) alert("http:// nu e in sir");
else alert("http:// e in sir");
Care e functia ce imparte un sir in parti de siruri intr-un array, pe baza unui separator?
array_merge() explode() implode()
$str = "mar,banana,pepene,para";
$arr = explode(",", $str);
var_export($arr);      // array (0=>"mar", 1=>"banana", 2=>"pepene", 3=>"para")
Indicati asocierea corecta: "luna-anotimp".
April - Autumn October - Spring July - Summer
July is a beautiful summer month.
- Iulie este o frumoasa luna de vara.
Indicati asocierea corecta: "luna-anotimp".
Octubre - Primavera Julio - Verano Abril - OtoƱo
Julio es un hermoso mes de verano.
- Iulie este o frumoasa luna de vara.
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